Anyone miss me?

No Its been a while.
Yes, another while.

Seems I only say hello, to say, its been a while.

Ive delibrately not wrote on the blog. Yeah, honest.

Ive tried to get my head clear on what to do next. Ive been writing, all handwritten, nothing typed up. I find it very slow to type all my scrawl afterwards. Basically I can barely read it.

Ive 4 WIPs on the go. One murder mystery, two childrens books and something Im not sure what on earth it is. Aiming for a root for one bad guy taking on multiple bad people type story. The latter 3 are all on hold. My main fun, and yes, Im really enjoying it, is my murder mystery. So much fun is being had, I made a very important decision last night.

I have given myself 6 months to finish and type it up. I suspect 1 month alone is purely for typing purposes. Then, I am going to submit it to publishers. This is an angle I never thought I would do, up til know I wrote for me, wrote to clear my head from the voices. Writing is therapietic to me. The pressure in my head dissaptes for a while. I could be nuts, who knows. Ive been told a few times, Im on "the spectrum" by friends. Ive never been checked out, and probably never will. Im me, and writing is my medicine.
Dont think my wife is as keen on me doing as much writing but then she gets to watch all her crappy TV and film and Netflix without me moaning now. No doubt her opinion may change if I ever get published. I dont even want loads of money, I just want people to read my bullshit. I think, in a big headed way, I dont write too bad. (please ignore this blog post as proof, I dont intend to edit it, maybe spell check, but no editing)

NaNoWriMo is coming soon. I've signed up but openly admit I will be cheating. I've loads of handwritten notes, but next to nothing typed up. I'm planning to use NaNoWriMo time to turn paper into electronic files. I type slowly, so it's going to a while.

Anyone out there, reading this. Happy writing.

Homework wk 1 pt 3 Character description

Here lies a problem.

A problem of not reading the homework criteria before you do. I have a limit of 200 words which I totally missed.

Here is the full version. Suppose I'll need to edit it, eventually.

--

As he walks slowly around the corner, he first notices seeing the dirty welly. With the amount of mud caked on it, he can't tell if it's supposedly green, black or even one of those white industrial food preparation types underneath.

The heat outside must be around 17 or 18°C outside in the full sun, and there he is, wearing a faded black parka jacket, with a furry hood, zipped up half way.

The semi open coat, exposed the neck and upper chest area, revealing some keys hanging from a small blue carabiner on a handmade necklace made from red paracord.

The aging frayed knot of the cord not so neatly looking amongst the key fobs.

Looking up at this face, covering his middle aged skin has some uneven scruffy stubble. Which needs the attention of a sink full of hot water, hand full of shaving foam and a Morrisons own brand, triple bladed razor soon.

His eyes covered by his usual all year, all weather protecting sunglasses. Its amazing how often sunglasses protect eyes in a windy street, or deflect oncoming rain, sleet or snow, while still giving perfect vision.

Resting ontop of his head, balanced loosely, is a fake fur, Russian soldier style hat. Ears covered by furry flaps. It's even sporting the red hammer and sickle motif badge.

He pulls out a plastic water bottle from a bulging front pocket on his jacket, taking the final swig of the now warm liquid. He crushes the empty bottle, replacing the lid before he throws it into the fly covered bin beside him.

He glances once more at his reflection in the shop window before he turns and heads off on his way.

Homework wk 1 pt2

As I travel the county lanes in my shitty car to work, from the corner of my eye, I see something which makes me pull over immediately.

A flock of around 20 sheep are lying on their sides, kicking and twitching their legs, in a blue field. The grass is bright blue.

The sheep are silent but all are moving. Keeping my gaze I pull my mobile from my inside pocket. I command my phone to call the nearest vet. Within moments of my explanation, her and an assistant have teleported to my location both clutching the same triangular device.

Futurelearn writing course

Once again, I have enrolled onto the free writing course on Futurelearn. This time I WILL finish it.

Everything I write for it, I will put here too.

Today we had to think of
a 3 facts and 1 fiction and
b 1 fact and 3 fiction

Each needed around 50 -  100 words.

Here is one of them (other isn't written yet) but which is the following a or b

Week 1 pt 1

According to the washing machine I have 1h 40mins to kill.
I'm  hungry and need snacks. The only money I can find is in a plastic bank bag with 100 pennies in it. Definitely not enough for this hunger. I need food AND soon.
A large bag of Chili Doritos and a crunchie, washed down with 2 litres of Dandelion and Burdock,  should do it.
I pick up my car keys and head to a nearby shop, but not before I grab my daughter's handgun and rubber Freddie Kruger mask from her bedside drawer.

Lazy post.

Well. I'm nothing if not honest. I just posted a question in the Ninja Writers Facebook group. So quick copy and paste.

Morning.

For us non writing professionals (as in earning enough to give up the day job).

1) What is (or was)  your day job?
2) Do you use the experience in your writing?

Me? Thanks for asking.

10 years lab chemist followed (and currently) by nearly 11 self employed, owning a pet care business 
And yes, I'm using both as idea makers for writing.

Also, unless I am listening to music or podcasts, my brain is always thinking, trying to come up with new ideas. Beauty and benefit of outdoor walking in the countryside.

Podcast that keep me sane

My day to day job, while I love it, does become tiresome without human conversation.

My brain goes off in many directions  lately, mostly how to kill people and get away with it.

To drown out the inner demon thoughts, I turned to listening to podcasts rather than music.

Comedy, factual, audio stories and real life crime flood my ears for a few hours a day.

I thought I would share a few I listen to. In no particular order.

@rangerpod
@theparapod
@killnofillpod
@thementalpod
@criminalshow
@frankontheradio
@hellobuglers
@helenandolly
@allusionistshow
@myfavmurder
@case_file
@slaughterthepod
@swordandscale

Apologies for the twitter name format, but you get the show names easier from them.

There are more but I got bored listing them.

Is my writing hiatus over?

As people can tell if you read this blog often, I've not posted in a while. Life always gets in the way.

My  desk where I do all hand written work, was covered in things belonging to my wife. Then she had me decorating over a few weekends. Amongst this was mothers day too.

(Even this post has been disturbed multiple times by her. 4th attempt to finish up to here)

As I look over, my writing desk has seedings starting off in a large tray full of mini pots. Mostly flowers for the garden, but some vegetables for our allotment will be soon sown.

Why can't I write on a laptop or tablet? Why do I have to handwrite using pen and paper and need a table?

This is a sort of mental torture to me. My brain now I have started writing, won't stop, it won't switch off. I'm constantly thinking of ideas, making notes on my phone, saving websites on Google Keep, but no actual writing of a story.

Now, today, I was reminded of an online course I started last year but didn't finish. Why didn't I finish it? Yeah, I know. Piss poor time management at home.

I need a timetable, one where my family should leave me alone when I am working.

Will it work?

Nah. Will it stuff.

The week I wish to forget

This has been a weird emotional week for me.

It started when I decided to write something different to my  book. Hoping a break, different thought processes might be reinvigorating to me, I choose a word as a writing prompt. Since I was already thinking about what to plant in my allotment this spring, I started writing about my history with allotments.

My earliest memories involved family members who are no longer with us. 8 of them in fact including my dad. This unfortunately coincided with the 6th anniversary of his death on Feb 15th. Yeah. I hit a downer.

Oh that's not all. I mistakenly misremembered the date. I originally thought it was the 13th. So, when I read my eldest son post on Facebook on the correct day, a huge wave of guilt kicked me all over. How could I forget the date he died?

And, wait for it. I had forgotten to take my happy pills this week as well.

I must have been a joy to be around for my family. No wonder they buy me lovely gifts.

Sherlock Series 4 Prediction UPDATE 2

Boy o boy. Was I wrong?

Hahahahahaha

Didn't even get close to guessing correctly.

Sherlock Series 4 Prediction UPDATE

Well. I watched episode 2. By the end of it, it appears not to be any direct connection to Moriarty. Not sister, nor wife, nor Moriarty with a sex change.

Now being a 3rd Holmes sibling is a weird direction to take. I didn't know there was one. And yes, why can't it be a sister not a brother. Maybe this one had a sex change.

Remember though, this is Sherlock Holmes, red herrings are often there, throwing us off the scent. There is one more episode to go. I am arrogantly sticking to my guns. I still think it is a Moriarty relative.

Tomorrow night we should find out. More to the point, I will find out if my scooby doo powers of deduction is any good.

Right or wrong, I enjoy the guess the storyline challenge. And will continue to post my guesses. Mind you, if I'm always wrong, I might change my mind. There's only so much self embarrassment I can take.

Coconut

Anyone who really knows me, knows I detest coconut.

I can detect it in any foods given to me. My wife hates this, especially when buying curry or other cooking sauces. Searching jars ingredients labels. She can say, it isn't in the sauce, I will argue it is. My tongue can sense the bits. As a superpower, its shit.

I can't help myself but I have to prove I'm right. So I always get the jar and look at the ingredients. Realise I can't read the small poxy writing on the label so have to hunt  for my glasses. I've never failed yet. One day, my detector tongue will make a mistake, but not yet.

Last night, I washed my hands with hand-wash from the dispenser. I thought I could smell coconut. I shuddered. I yelled for my wife, 2 rooms away, asking if she bought coconut hand-wash. No. She reckoned it was Honey and Milk. Small banter occurred. I wasn't convinced. I was positive she had bought coconut , and on purpose. I rooted around the bathroom drawers. Found the bottle. Damn, she was right, it says Honey and Milk. Still not convinced, I check the ingredients. Aha. Nope, the word coconut isn't listed.

Why. Why. Why can I still smell horrible coconut?

I re-examine the label. And look up  Cocamidopropyl betaine. Check out the picture attached. I rest my case. Goodnight.

Sherlock Series 4 Prediction

I decided to blog this instead of twitter in case I spoil Sherlock for anyone who hasnt seen New Years Day's episode yet.

So be aware there will be a small spoiler in it.

So, alot is being made of Moriarty (and his Miss Me messages) in this episode, even though he doesnt appear in it. Or does he?

Further along in the episode, Dr Watson meets a mysterious woman on a bus. She gives him her mobile number out of the blue, and some texting goes on between them. After he tries to stop all contact with her, there is another "chance" meeting at a bus stop.

Now, who is she?

Well, this is where my new writing head has started looking into storylines in detail, something I never used to do. Looking for crumbs and exanding them into possible ideas.

Crumbs so far. Moriarty mentioned alot. This woman appears. I see a connection between the two.

1) Employee of Moriarty
2) Sister of Moriarty
3) Wife of Moriarty
4) Moriarty himself, somehow survived, and had a sex change.

I personally think it could be 3) but I would be more impressed if it was 4)

As a connection to Moriarty, she (he), could start messing with Dr Watson, in a tactic to challenge Sherlock.

The more I think of it, the more it makes sense to me.

So lets see. Have I cracked the background storyline of this series's Sherlock? (PS I'm British, I refuse to call it a season)